My Story

Where to start....

To give you a little history, because of certain unfortunate circumstances unrelated to this blog (i might have to start a whole other blog on that...UGH!), while pregnant with my 3rd child, I found myself going through a bitter and gruling divorce. I ended up a single mom with three small children - 7, 2 and a newborn. In NO WAY was I looking for nor did I desire another man in my life. I've always been a survivor. I am a strong person and always bounce back. Though it was very hard, with the help of the Lord Jesus Christ, my family and friends, I was able to get back on my feet. I had a good job, beautiful children and was actively serving on the praise and worship team at my church. I was happy and content.

About a year later, at church one day, I was approached by a girl who was new to the church and who recently joined the choir. She invited me to a group outing so I could meet her brother-in-law, Dan Baker. She was married to his identical twin brother, Dave, and it sounded as though she was tired of him tagging along as a 3rd wheel all the time. I graciously declined, explaining I really wasn't interested in meeting anyone. She kept pursuing me and seemed nice enough, so I decided to go, but asked one of my oldest friends, who I grew up with, to come with me. I didn't have many friends so I thought it might be good for me. It turned out that my friend who I brought with me ended up knowing the twin brothers from a Bible study she used to go to! Small world. I had a really good time. Everyone was very friendly and welcoming. I wasn't physically attracted to Dan, but he seemed to be very nice, fun and totally opposite from my ex-husband. And that was what eventually attracted me to him.

Long story short - after several group events and get-togethers, we courted for over a year. He was 28 and had never been married and had no children. He loved my children and they loved him. It all meshed so naturally. He got along with everyone. My family loved him. I met people that knew him since he was little and everyone had nothing but great things to say about the "twins". His parents were simple and humble. They seemed nice and accepted me and my children with open arms.

On August 13, 1999, we were married. By this time, my children were 11, 5 and 3. We were the epitome of the perfect all-American family. He took on a ready made family as well as a ruthless ex-husband, Steven, who would bring a custody battle against me every few years just so he wouldn't have to pay child support. He never won, but it sure caused a lot of tribulation (oops - other blog, sorry). Anyway, we had a daughter in 2000 and a son in 2002. We were just one BIG happy family. We served together at church. People would come up to me all of the time that knew what I had been through with my first husband and tell me how seeing us and how happy we were gave them hope. I would plan occasional weekend getaways, date nights, etc. to keep the romance alive. We had family dinners together, did stuff with the kids and enjoyed life. I vowed I would not get divorced again and was willing to work through anything - never thinking the worst would happen.

We opened a business in late 2002 and 2 more over the next 2 years. They were booming and I was in the process of franchising them. I saw my dream and vision come to life. But I always vowed that I would never let them come before my family and never did. I still drove my kids to school and picked them up; I still cooked dinner every night and either Dan or I was there to tuck them into bed every night. After God, my children and marriage were always my priority.

After a couple of years into the marriage, I started noticing Dan getting progressively more and more angry and lose his temper quicker. Eventually he would fly off the handle for no reason and yell so loud the windows almost shook. My children became afraid, as did I, and my oldest daughter withdrew almost all together from him. He was never physical, but it got so bad that I insisted on several occassions he get counseling, but he kept promising he would control it and it would get better. Other than the temper, there were no other red flags.

Now - on a side note - I have always been very open with my children and talked to them about never talking to strangers (even if they are Santa or a Policeman!), about good touch/bad touch etc. - even from family!! and that no matter what - they ALWAYS tell!! I would go into great detail with them because I have seen enough programs and news stories to know what goes on. I wanted them to be educated rather than gullable and too trusting.

It was Aug. '04 and we had just celebrated our 5 year anniversary. My Tampa shop was newly opened and it was open mic night, which is usually a very busy night. Dan looked tired, so I volunteered to go to the shop and work that while my oldest daughter was at my 1st shop helping out there. It turned out to be unusually slow, so I took off early. I grabbed a piece of pie to go to surprise Dan and headed home. When I got to the house, I went in the front door and noticed the TV off and the house quiet. Since it was around 9pm, I figured he was probably tucking the kids into bed, or checking on them, so I didn't call out. I quietly walked up the stairs to see. When I got to the hall light switch and turned it on, I saw him standing at the edge of MY 7 1/2 year old daughter's bed completely naked with an erection, while OUR 3 year old daughter was sleeping in the bed right next to hers. He must have heard me coming up the stairs and only had time to get off of her. I looked and she was sleeping on her stomach with the back of her pull-ups pulled down with her bare buttocks exposed. Everything from that point on was in slow motion. My heart dropped. My adrenaline raced. I was in complete shock and couldn't process all of it. All I knew was that I wanted to make sure the children didn't wake up and see him like that. So I quietly shuffled him downstairs and immediately called 911. He pleaded with me not to. He was hysterical - flopping and flailing about like a lunatic. My 2nd call was to his brother and sister-in-law. I couldn't believe those words were coming out of my mouth. It was unbelievable. It was humiliating. Would they believe me? What just happened? My whole life fell apart at that moment. I had so many things going through my head at one time. My biggest fear was that my children would be taken away because of what he did. But all I knew at that point was that I wanted him out, taken to jail and to be locked up forever. He needed to pay for what he did.

How dare he take advantage of the precious innocence and trust of MY daughter - a child HE helped raise from the age of 18 months, who trusted him and called him Daddy! She had a sleep disorder where she would go into such a deep sleep, she couldn't wake herself up to use the restroom and would often wet the bed. He took advantage of this. This man came into our lives like a wolf in lambs clothing. He preyed on the innocent. He was the master of deceit and had everyone that knew him fooled - including me. He portrayed himself at church as an upstanding Christian man, praying for people at the alter while he was doing this!!! I wanted to kill him. Sometimes I wish I had. But it just wasn't in me. I always said if anyone ever touched or hurt my child, I would kill them, but when you are in the situation, you really find out your true make up. Once I was done with the 911 operator, I ran back upstairs. I stopped at the boys room (10 and 1) who were asleep in their bunkbeds. I then went into the girls room and flipped on the light. They didn't wake up. I looked over my little girl, pulled her pull-ups back up and covered her up. I gently hugged her, sobbing and whispering how sorry I was that he did this to her and that I wasn't there to protect her. She never woke up. I checked my 3 yr old daughter who was also sound asleep and shut the light and went back downstairs to make sure he didn't try to run and waited for the police.

By the time the police, forensic people, counselor and everyone else involved were done and finally took him to jail, it was 2am. I pleaded with the officer not to tell my ex-husband Steven (who was also a deputy in my county). I told him I would call him myself after I got the kids to school. He assured me he wouldn't. Only a few hours later, I had to wake the kids up, fix breakfast, get them ready and drive them to school as if nothing had happened. They just got out of the car when my ex called. He heard what happened and threatened that if I didn't give him the kids he would take me to court. He promised it was just until things calmed down and then he would give them back. I packed a bag for a week and he came to the house that same day to get it. He again reiterated that it was just temporary.

Dan Baker was only in jail for about 2 weeks before his parents bailed him out. I pleaded with them not to but they did anyway. When he got out of jail, he started going to Countryside Christian Center, a large church in Clearwater and immediately started dating a woman from the singles group!! He was out and about - free to go where he pleased and do what he wanted for ONE YEAR until his sentencing. He hired a criminal attorney to "defend" him. The State Attorney's Office told me if we went to trial, there was a 'chance' he could walk free because I was the only witness, did not see the actual act, and I was his wife. I couldn't take that chance. They initially tried to plea out for 24 months, but I fought and finally got 4 years in prison with 5 years probation. This was still ludicrous to me, but at least he was guaranteed a prison sentence. During the sentencing the judge allowed me to speak. I blew up an 8x10 photo of my beautiful daughter at the age of 6 (when he admittedly started doing this). I reiterated how I found him, what I saw and was looking right at his girlfriend sitting in the back of the courtroom. I couldn't imagine that she had gotten the real story because if she had, who in their right mind would be with a child molestor. His mother wouldn't look at me and plugged her ears from hearing what I was saying. Dan just stood there with a smug, unremorseful look on his face. In Aug. '05, Daniel Baker was sentenced and taken to prison.

Right after the crime, and in my state of dispair, Steven coerced me to sign a "temporary custody agreement" which his attorney 'just happened' to whip up, stating the Dept. of Children and Families wanted something in writing. Normally, I would never trust him, but I wasn't in my right mind, so I signed it. Dan was in jail, I got an injunction and filed for divorce. I did everything right. I requested my children back. Steven refused and notified me he was keeping them. This led to a 2 year full blown custody battle. I had no time to mourn what happened or pick up the pieces. I had to hire an attorney of my own and fight. He and his attorney were very shrewd and prolonged things which led to them establishing residency of the children and the tables turned. Instead of it just being a matter of going back to court and having the temporary agreement withdrawn, it was now MY burden of proof to prove him unfit. After 2 years and $20k in attorney fees, and being advised by several other attorneys I consulted with that my chances were slim to none at this point, I eventually ran out of money and had to settle. I now have visitation with the 3 children I bore, raised and loved more than life, and pay HIM child support.

My shops suffered because I had people standing in front of my local shop passing out copies of the newspaper article of Dan, telling customers not to support a child molestor's legal fund. Word eventually spread and as a result of the bad PR, in addition to my inability mentally, emotionally and physically, to be able to run and manage 3 shops, while trying to deal with my life falling apart, staying strong for the 2 children I still had at home, fighting the custody battle and dealing with the loss of my 3 other children, I ended up having to close the shops within one week of each other. A week after I closed my last shop was Dan's sentencing. I now also had to go out and find a job so I could afford to pay the mortgage, all the bills and expenses, child support for my 3 and be able to support my 2 little ones I still had at home, which I did.

Daniel Baker was released this past December 2008 and moved back to Holiday, FL (where his victim-my daughter- also lives!!!). Our divorce was finalized on February 11, 2009 after he 'suddenly' agreed to most of my requests which I was advised by my attorney to take (after a 5 year, $25k battle). A month later on 3/13/09, he was remarried to Lisa Stephanie Goodman, the woman he started dating after his arrest. He waived visitation for 6 months but has the right to go back to court and request it in August 2009. How it is even feasible that he is not allowed within 1000 feet of any OTHER children, but has the 'right' to some form of contact or visitation with OURS is ludicrous! Also, why there is no law in effect prohibiting predators from moving into the same county as their victims is beyond me. The laws, in my opinion, do more to protect the rights of the guilty than of the innocent.

I can't say it hasn't been hell, because it has. There were times I didn't want to live. It was more than any one person should have to deal with - especially not all at once. But now, after 5 long, hard years, things are getting better. My 2 little ones are happy, healthy, normal 6 and 8 year olds, who are doing great in school and have adjusted to all of the changes in their lives very well. I have managed to keep Dan away from them and intend to continue to fight to do that. I have a wonderful job that gives me flexibility to be able to attend school functions and events for my children. Unfortunately, my relationship with my other 3 has changed dramatically and has been very strained from all of this. I don't know how to be a part time mom. Out of all that happened, that was probably the hardest thing I had to deal with - was not having my children live with me anymore. But it will turn around. God is so faithful. He sustained me through it all and held me up when I couldn't stand on my own. It was only by His hand that I didn't lose my house. If I did the numbers they would never match up, but somehow my bills were taken care of and we never went without. He was there when no one else was, when I would cry myself to sleep at night and no one knew. Had it not been for the grace, comfort and provision of the Lord, I wouldn't be here today. I owe all of my strength, protection and blessings to Him alone.

Here is Daniel A Baker's flyer:

He is currently residing at: 1741 Dander Drive, Holiday FL 34690

If you live anywhere near here, please watch your children!

(click to enlarge):